14 Comments
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Christina Arenas's avatar

Loved the “what I got wrong.” I am finding the same issue. Insecurity among the men that don’t make as much money as I do. It seems that most men sadly get their security from money. Based on my experience, men want you to make a salary somewhat equal to theirs. Most don’t want you to completely depend on them but they also want to feel needed (including financially). So that brings me to ask the question: what are signs that an average income man is secure with himself?

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Evan Marc Katz's avatar

All that and your favorite part is what I got wrong?! 😂 The way you know if a man is secure is by bringing out the best in him, not looking down on him for making less, not telling him to get a better job, not making a big deal about picking up the check. If you do that and he STILL leads with insecurity, toss him back in the sea.

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Christina Arenas's avatar

I like it. Simple and to the point. In addition to doing that, should I hide the diamond jewelry and Louboutins or just “come as I am.” 😊 I’ve heard mixed advice on this.

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NEMM Design's avatar

That’s right! You do you! But for you, not for men to see it...wear what makes you happy and self-confident and watch how men react, pay close attention to why they say...I have heard I’m high maintenance because of that, [and I am not! for the record, I don’t have big fancy brands but dress well it’s about good taste not money] So it tells me a lot about that man...one great question from the movie “the ugly truth” is “why do you love [like] me?” And listen to the answer...

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Evan Marc Katz's avatar

You do you. Just note: If you can afford Louboutins, you can afford a dating coach. 😂

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NEMM Design's avatar

Exactly! 👍

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Tracy's avatar

Great article on a core loveu principle and a key issue I had to get over to find the one. Also my friends and I loved A Fish Called Wanda in high school! Such a great movie. Give them a few years. 😂

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Heather's avatar

Resonate with this. Thanks for your words

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Susie Hambey's avatar

Can you please post information on private coaching.

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KC12's avatar

I'm old (75). In my 20s and 30s, there were three kinds of single straight men: those looking to settle down with the right person (50%), those not ready yet but thought they would eventually (35%) and those 15% determined to avoid it. A half-century later, men who want a committed relationship seem to have become an endangered species. What happened, Mr. K?

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Evan Marc Katz's avatar

It’s not an endangered species: 50% of divorced men over 65 get remarried.

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Evan Marc Katz's avatar

Same as your initial estimate from 50 years ago.

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KC12's avatar

Understood and thanks, but when I was in my 20s and 30s a divorced man over 65 was not on the radar—though it did happen occasionally. Usually to a Canadian Prime Minister or similar.

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