I find this really depressing. Maybe I’m in denial but I feel like at 51 I still get attention from men. Maybe not as much as 20 years ago, but I still get the car honks, the cat calls, men talking to me in the grocery store or in the street. Maybe it’s the culture where I live? Not sure. My ego has taken a serious blow lately since I had a double mastectomy last fall and reconstruction has not been going well and has been a very slow process. I also gained weight during all this, and I am feeling way less confident in how I look, and my looks have always been something I take pride in, deservedly or not. However, I am still getting some guys’ attention at least. Not sure if it just means they would be dtf, or if they would “move mountains” for me as described in the article. I don’t know how I’ll do online because I have not been online since I was 47. I am a physically fit woman, and I like physically fit men. I used to feel relieved to look at my most recent boyfriend because he had nice muscles and was fit and trim and I was really attracted to his body. I always had this feeling like, “thank god I got one who looks good to me.” It was a major sense of relief, but then he turned out to be a total jerk, a liar, and a cheater. It makes me sad to think I’ll have to settle for some saggy old dude who doesn’t work out. I think I might just wait and be single, to tell the truth. I have tried to be with men who I was on the fence about physically, and it was not satisfying to me, regardless of how great a personality and heart he had. I guess I’ll see what happens when i go back online in a few weeks. I just don’t think it should be too much to ask that I find a guy who likes me who also works out and takes care of his body, even in his 50’s and beyond. Sorry about the kind of rambling post, but I have a lot of thoughts about this.
That’s really depressing - well most of us know that already. So I guess men have all the power to choose from the tender age of 35 upwards… and if you are online dating (which I was) all the 50 something and 60 something guys are hitting on 40 something old gals. Well there are always exceptions… coz women do look after themselves a lot more than men so dating pool might not be totally hopeless.
I find this really depressing. Maybe I’m in denial but I feel like at 51 I still get attention from men. Maybe not as much as 20 years ago, but I still get the car honks, the cat calls, men talking to me in the grocery store or in the street. Maybe it’s the culture where I live? Not sure. My ego has taken a serious blow lately since I had a double mastectomy last fall and reconstruction has not been going well and has been a very slow process. I also gained weight during all this, and I am feeling way less confident in how I look, and my looks have always been something I take pride in, deservedly or not. However, I am still getting some guys’ attention at least. Not sure if it just means they would be dtf, or if they would “move mountains” for me as described in the article. I don’t know how I’ll do online because I have not been online since I was 47. I am a physically fit woman, and I like physically fit men. I used to feel relieved to look at my most recent boyfriend because he had nice muscles and was fit and trim and I was really attracted to his body. I always had this feeling like, “thank god I got one who looks good to me.” It was a major sense of relief, but then he turned out to be a total jerk, a liar, and a cheater. It makes me sad to think I’ll have to settle for some saggy old dude who doesn’t work out. I think I might just wait and be single, to tell the truth. I have tried to be with men who I was on the fence about physically, and it was not satisfying to me, regardless of how great a personality and heart he had. I guess I’ll see what happens when i go back online in a few weeks. I just don’t think it should be too much to ask that I find a guy who likes me who also works out and takes care of his body, even in his 50’s and beyond. Sorry about the kind of rambling post, but I have a lot of thoughts about this.
That’s really depressing - well most of us know that already. So I guess men have all the power to choose from the tender age of 35 upwards… and if you are online dating (which I was) all the 50 something and 60 something guys are hitting on 40 something old gals. Well there are always exceptions… coz women do look after themselves a lot more than men so dating pool might not be totally hopeless.
I like your take, Lu. Optimism is the only answer.
Awesome! I love your thoughts on this! Going to adopt these for myself